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The Mystic's Love Flowering

By: Eric N Peterson

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There is another kind of love blossoming inside me. This is the love flowering of the sage or of the magician. I planted this garden by committing to realize my purpose here in this life. At the time I didn't realize at the time that I was planting! These new, buds laden with dew have sprung up from the depth of my heart out of the blue. My body and the area of my heart especially feels so much happiness in response, as if I am made for this strange loving.

Happiness and unlimited gratitude and total patience: these terms offer clues only as to the mood of this unfamiliar flower of love. Peaceful deliberation of Being-ecstasy. I turn to another and identify my Self, but in a completely different mode. I sit with a friend, in contact with that divine being. The recognition is non-intellectual. It is physical-both electrical and magnetic. It is from the heart. And when the light of being shines , the act of loving one another in this strange way becomes even wilder. It appears as if our body/minds are particle accelerators. Physicality and consciousness seem to act like a species of mirror, folding and twisting and redirecting the pure light of being--slowing it down, creating color and pattern and planes of physical objects that can feel and intermingle and dance. This love is ecstasy, ecstasy!

This love path of the mystic has not been simple for me. When I entered puberty and the oppressive world of known things began to get hold of me, I began my descent. I was determined to be original. However, my hunt for truth and meaning appeared to expose only lies and hypocrisy, especially in myself. I continued to look for the real me, peeled off the layers, found nothing. If I put on one set of clothing, I transformed into that type of person for the world. Internally too, though I preferred rebellious characters over conforming ones, I could find nothing of factual value that made me one thing rather than another. I seemed to be just my clothes.

If I dressed in rebellious clothing, people abused me. If I dressed conservatively, they treated me well. It became apparent that people reacted to programmed responses to externals. I was dismayed and disillusioned by this result. No one else appeared to mind the utter lack of reality in social relations. I felt so alien from other people that, in trying to protect my falling sense of sanity, I began to dislike humanity.

And so I came to be paranoid and alone, frenzied and spiteful, utterly dejected. Deep down, I knew myself to be a monster, something that should never have been there, something that no one can know about. But a seed remained alive. Even in my darkest hours in hell, when I longed to kill myself hour-by-hour and minute-by-minute--even then the naked, mischievous daughter of my dreamer self grinned and laughed with glee at knowing the joy of existence.

Even in those darkest hours of my life, irrespective of how much despair and misery I generated, a spark of me knew that this life is a beautiful game. That flicker, that mischievous daughter, is sprouting now, coming out into the world through me, taking control of this body and walking this planet again for the first time since my youngest childhood. She is the one who understands how to love in freedom. The daughter-spirit knows how to love without separating any one thing from any other thing. She knows how to love without force. She knows how to love with every part of her, audaciously, boldly, joyfully. She knows how to be without restricting herself. She knows how to be in agreement with others, with all that is.

This is amazing to me. I witness this makeover in myself and-gratitude!--I observe it in my fellow travelers. I do not know if you have the knowledge of the fact that the Tequihua volunteers are mainly people who have committed to realizing themselves and that we accept this work of transmitting the Toltec arts and traditions with the intent of changing ourselves into our Selves. Over a period of time I have seen many of my colleagues become increasingly themselves, increasingly original, increasingly strong and free. To see the light beginning to shine brighter through some of the faces of these, my dearest friends--how much joy?

Love and gratitude to you, my friend who are reading this, without whom there would be no teaching. The Tequihua Foundation:

Article Source: http://depositarticles.com/

Eric N. Peterson is a Toltec priest and member of The Tequihua Foundation, a Riverside, Southern CA nonprofit whose mission is to continue the ancient consciousness-transforming arts of the Toltecs. The Aka Dua is an energy prepared by a particular Toltec line. The Aka Dua assists in the alchemical process of transformation by which an ordinary human becomes the shaman.

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