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Domestic Violence Cycle : Drunk With Power

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A few years ago, the Georgia Department of Human Resource put out a report which stated that every nine seconds a woman in the United States becomes the victim of domestic violence.

That is a shocking statistic. Former Wisconsin Congressman Mark Green put it in perspective when he stated, "If the numbers we see in domestic violence were applied to terrorism or gang violence, the entire country would be up in arms, and it would be the lead story on the news every night."

Indeed it would and then maybe the glaring and harsh spotlight would focus on the people that have turned domestic violence into the epidemic that it is; the abusers.

There are many motivating factors that cause a spouse to lash out at their significant other. As a child they may have been exposed to domestic violence by their parents. From that experience, the abuser may have figured (incorrectly of course) that was how things were supposed to be regarding man-woman relationships. They loved their father so how could he be wrong?

Another possibility is that they themselves experienced that brutality first hand. The interaction between parent and child was a violent one. They still feel the pain and anger from that time in their lives and are constantly reliving it much to the detriment of their spouse or girlfriend.

It could be any or all of the above or even a whole different set of reasons for verbally and physically assaulting the person they supposedly love. However there is one aspect more than all the others that keeps the cycle of violence going. Power.

As one abuser told Oprah Winfrey, "I had every intention to take her life. I felt like I had power and control over something in my life. It made me feel invincible."

Abusers are the ultimate control freaks. Anything can set them off. That means a tough day at work, unfounded jealousy or just seeing their spouse in a good mood which they did not authorize. The point is to continually exercise that power over the victim.

And it never stops. There is never a time when the abuser finally feels totally in control and lets up on their significant other. The lower the victim sinks the more invincible the abuser feels. Like a king from the Middle Ages that has conquered land as far as the eye can see, they feel powerful but they always want more.

So it is no surprise that when the victim tries to flee this nightmare, her risk of being severely injured or worse increases dramatically, about seventy five percent according to the Coalition for Battered Women.

Barbara Price is the executive director, "He's losing power and control, and that's what it's about. Ms Price tells Barbara Stewart of The New York Times the logic goes something like this, ''If I can't have you, no one will."

Meaning no one, especially not the victim is going to take away their power. Yes some of these individuals finally wake up to what they have been doing and decide to get help. With far too many others, no such luck.

The potential loss of power and control makes them even more determined to get it back. Whatever tenuous grasp they had with reality before has slipped away. They become blinded with just one obsession and that is to restore the kingdom to its rightful heir; namely themselves.

And when the significant others who were the victims of this abuse refuse to cooperate? The statistics and many of the tragic stories we see on the nightly news are the result.

Article Source: http://depositarticles.com/

Article written by Daryl Campbell. Get the nine step formula for surviving an abusive relationship at The Relationship Tip

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