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Asian Dating is a Gut Feeling

By: Steve Eyes

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Most single guys are established in their life. Their mornings, afternoons and evenings have a schedule they are comfortable with and seldom will they go beyond the limits of that routine. Even a single guy’s aloneness can become his norm and if someone crosses his path that interest him, he rationalizes instead of trying to change. Many times this leads to puzzlement – he just isn’t sure if she is the one. He over thinks, he pauses, rewinds, goes forward until nothing makes sense about being involved. Soon he is back to his calm routine of drinking beer and watching football on Sunday. The loneliness he feels won’t go away and after a lot of beer drinking Sundays, he may try to satisfy that emptiness again. But just like before, he soon feels he is out of his comfort zone and the story repeats itself. After awhile, he is asking himself, how do I find love?

This problem persist because he wants the girl to immediately fit into his comfort zone. At first, when he sees her, he is energized and this is sufficient to keep the relationship alive. In time the lady’s personality and feelings make him over think the relationship and the exhilaration dissipates. At one time it was electrifying, but it loses its gleam as the relationship moves forward – especially when the lady’s dialogue involves changes in his life. He feels the pressure and wants out. Soon, he is back to satisfying his emptiness with beer and Sunday afternoon football.

You see ladies, guys don’t have the same type of makeup as you do and don’t easily trust innate feelings. He’ll over think what’s in his heart, especially if he feels the only way he can love you is for him to make major changes in his life (they may not be major to you, but to him missing a Sunday afternoon of football may seem worse than going through hurricane Ivan). The gap will broaden until it is beyond closing, no matter how he may genuinely feel about you. Whatever he felt at first now lie in a place that has no understanding of intuition. It may still be there, but buried in a cluster of perplexity. What can you do ladies? Not much, except maybe back off a little. What can you do guys? Don’t think about it – trust your gut feeling.

I just got done saying that a guy’s feelings may be buried in confusion. What a man doesn’t realize that this is what separate men from women’s intuition. What we interrupt as confusion, a lady calls intuition and has complete trust in those feelings no matter how disorganized it may seem. In other words, guys, they go with the flow. We will fight it, we will rationalize it, we will try to hide it with alcohol, cover it with masculine bravo, but instead, we should listen to it. Don’t run, don’t hide, just let it be and let it take its course. Scary, thought, isn’t it, guys? But if you are fatigued of the merry-go-round of emptiness you may want to give it a chance.

I know some of you guys are still looking for simplicity, so here goes. Our visual instincts are in harmony when we first see a lady. All she needs to do is give us a little sign of encouragement and our hormones are in high gear. We don’t think further than the moment, care about house payments or closet space, our eyes see what we like, a signal says it is ok to like what we see and we are in heaven. Simple! Now let’s progress ahead where the lady starts thinking about how life would be beyond the weekend movie, sexual encounters and the sporadic dinner together. She wants more. If you fight it, she is gone, so you let the door open. She is inside with some feelings – you thought you could manage it, but now you seem to be reacting to her feelings. Is this bad, guys, that you are reacting to her feelings? We seem to interpret a reaction, even if it is a positive one, as being bad. At this point we begin the examination between what we feel and what we know. We know we like to watch foot ball, but how will my feelings amend me being able to watch football on Sunday? (I know ladies, you just can’t believe it’s that hard to decide between football and love, but for guys, it can be). When there is a debate between our head and our heart, ladies, the head usually wins. What I’m telling guys, if what you feel inside is positive, don’t obscure it with other likely scenarios. Let it flow – trust that what you feel inside can be a positive in all aspects of your life. But for now, don’t think, just be.

Guys, I’m not saying that in time you may become conscious that she is not appropriate for you and shouldn’t get out, but what I am saying is we usually kill the opportunity to find out before we let time take its course. Usually, we over think our reactions until the only reaction left is we feel she is an imposition in our life. Than she’s gone and the loneliness comes back – another Sunday, one more 6 pack or two of beer and you are getting older, lonelier and maybe, just maybe, wiser.

I say wiser because I think younger guys fit the above sort better than an older gent. As a guy gets older, he may grasp not to react so rapidly, but trust that what he feels may actually enhance other aspects of his life. This is why a lot of younger Filipina ladies like older men. To them, older men are more settled, tolerant and willing.

Obviously, guys have met a lady and after the first date knew she wasn’t the one. Even then a guy will call it a mistake rather than a gut feeling. He’ll say something like, “I don’t know what I saw in her, but man she isn’t for me.” It is when it goes beyond the first date and his gut has already said, “man she is the one” that he will start to talk himself out of any connection when the lady wants a little more than the two of them getting together on Friday and Saturday nights. I”m telling you guys, trust that initial feeling, let the confusion in, don’t fight it and give it time. You may find that you can still keep an eye on your football game on Sundays while she is nibbling on your ear.
That’s it, short and sweet. Guys, if you feel she is the one after a date or two, trust your gut feeling and don’t talk yourself out of it. There is more to life than Sunday afternoon football. There is Monday night football also. Just kidding, smile, let what you feel be your guide and forget thinking too solid about how those feelings may amend your life. Let it flow and let her love you.

Article Source: http://depositarticles.com/

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