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It’s Rough Out There in the Business World - a Character Composite

By: Aubrey Moulton


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It seems to be the case now, thanks to a shaky financial setup and wavering small business, we all should be glad for our jobs. However, it can be quite irritating to uphold confident outlook when your co-workers are as annoying as the included list. Do you know anyone like the following? Do you wish you didn't?
Warnings materialize frequently on every surface of your office reiterating the rules. You feel like you have to take a careful look around before even thinking about disobeying protocol. Your managers seem to be aware of your every move. An error of miniscule proportions results in workers being gathered up by company spies never to be seen again. Your desk sags from the crushing weight of stacks of industry operating manuals. You must memorize these books and recite by rote every month. Your team dress code has been reduced to colorless, unisex jumpsuits sewn of the least forgiving material. Hate to tell you this: you are now relegated to the whims of the Fuhrer.
"Step up to the plate." "Let's put our heads together." "CC me on that." "Heads will roll." "If you don't like it, there's the door." "Running around like a chicken with its head cut off." "Tighten our belts." "Turn it around." "Give 110 percent." "Win-win situation." "Take ownership." "Think outside the box." "Be the solution, not the problem." Everybody says these - that’s why they are called cliches. However, the Cliche never utters an original thought. He’s become so immersed in the lingo of the workplace that he has sadly become nothing more than a parrot. The section of the brain is responsible for innovative speech has shriveled within the skull and become useless.
You won't be able to miss it if you have the JeJune working among you. She believes everything is peachy and sunny always. Many would call her Pollyanna. Plenty would be right. Jokes make no sense to this type, so don’t waste your time. Her outlook is that everyone in the office is truthful, sympathetic and genuine. She wants to be everyone’s pal. This can be a good thing, particularly if you are tired of eating your lunch all by yourself after being made a fool of by thesome chap on your team, and written up for it by the Fuhrer.You almost have to feel bad for the JeJune, because if she remains in the workplace, such naivete is bound to crumble.
So, you've read the descriptions, admit it: these employees are around and about you daily. And there are plenty of other characters. In the daily rat race, it can be simple to point out the idiosyncracies of those around you. So, which ones do you sit next to for 40 hours a week?

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